Ihaveahotass

2007-01-12T22:00:00.000+08:00

Sex in a motel, now that's hot.

Before I begin,

H A P P Y B I R T H D A Y Y O N G S H A N N I N G.

You legal bitch.

I still have 6 more months till I'm legal. So today, the birthdaysluttygirl dressed like a boho chick and claims that she is Beyonce. HAHA

I love the rain, you know. I love rainy days and these two days have been my favourite. Despite the fact that I can't sleep in, I still love rainy days. It's so beautiful, so tranquil hearing the raindrops pitter patter on the window panes, how your feet and body get lightly soaked, the breeze, the sky. Perfect. For E, I like how the clothes get semi-transparent, now that's hot.

Not to mention, I almost slipped and fell while walking home. Unlike Shan Ning Yong, I won't curse the rain just because I slipped. I'll be thankful that I slipped, how very excite! The thrilling
sensation of slipping and the oh-I-didn't-fall-looks-around feeling.

Because I've got the Ipod and Shan Borat Yong has an ipod mini.

I hate the cats under my block, there are four black cats (somewhat like tiesto but bigger). They just freak me out every night and morning. I always chant lines in my mind when I'm under my block; ' I cannot let the cat walk between my legs, I'll have bad luck '. That's my motivation to be alert and avoid them.

I like how when I'm walking to the train station and I bumped into E midway, unplanned. It's like delibrately taking that path so that I'll bump into E rather than taking another route which is so much shorter. ( Actually, there's only one route from my house to the station )

I don't really know on what subject I'm blogging about, I am just typing anything that is topping my small brain.

And

I'm in the movies mood now. I've watched John Tucker Must Die three times. I'm almost finishing Loving Annabelle and waiting for E to watch 50 First Dates with. High School Musical is really nice yet boring yet nice.

Also, I am very addicted to the Nitendo console. I was playing Yahoo Games to relive my addiction. So, E and I decided to get one for ourselves. I'm very excite!

I love rainy days.

2007-01-10T09:14:00.000+08:00

I'm very excite!

Okay

Happy New Year Everyone =)

I've been back at school for about a week now and my laptop failed me. I had to get it reformatted, I spent 2 days at the IT helpdesk and attended lesson with no laptop. I can't survive without my laptop in class, I just had to stare at the blank table space in front of me and admire and envy my classmates who are busy chatting away in msn and doing work. =(

Well, everything's back on track, School Rugby and of course E. E always leave me wanting more. Today we mastered the art of self-control, eerr did we? Training was great, met up with everyone. =) I'm happy today.

I can't wait for the weekends now.

How did you guys celebrated The New Year?

Well, how about getting on the Cable Car and when the clock strikes twelve, the fireworks dances up and then you kiss your favourite person on earth?

Now, I can put it on my " WHAT I DID IN 2007 " list. It is the most ideal way to celebrate it.

Four, Tres, Two, Uno!

D to E to the L-i-c-i-o-u-s

I'm very excite!

2006-12-29T23:29:00.000+08:00

May your 17th birthday be really special (just like you are to me) I may not bring you balloons or flowers, or even surprise you at the door when the clock strikes twelve. But I sincerely it's filled with cheer and smiles. You light up my life and I'm determined to light up yours and make it a splendid birthday.

I would like to share your birthday cake with you.

HAPPY BRITHDAY!!!!!

2006-12-29T16:56:00.000+08:00

This could very well be the last

Because the power of goodbye is greater than I love you

2006-12-29T14:14:00.000+08:00

Carebear says, " Let's Share "

We were taught to share, to give and take, but we were also taught that we cannot share personal things like toothbrush, underwear etc etc. Does personal things include your lover? The voice within concludes that it doesn't include. It's not like I don't comprehend because I do. It gets really insulting when someone says 'you don't understand'. I have been through school like everyone else, whatever being said to me, I'll absorb and comprehend.

Even when I understand the situation, there is still this urge in me to fight for what I want even if I know I can't have it. It leaves me satisfied knowing I've put up a fight.

I do open up to matters that I know I can't handle myself meaning can't get over it myself. Matters I can handle myself, I rather keep it because I know it would go away faster than the speed of light. But I see no harm in opening it up if someone is there to listen, I think. It is like having issues with my own self and then someone interfer with their own views. Well if you're there to listen, then do your job with words of comfort like ' Oh come on look, everything is fine ' instead of getting upset and losing your cool because of how ridiculous someone is feeling at the moment. Please let's not forget who was the one in need and who offered the listening ear.

You don't snatch, you ask when you want something with a please. All the anger, temper and displeasure were redundant. I don't understand injecting harsh offensive crude words into your lover's heart even before they could go "you hurt me big time" and then innocently go 'I don't mean it'. It irritates me everytime because the harm is already done. It leaves an impression.

I feel apprehensive when everyone likes what I like. Like how everyone likes the very pretty dress in Zara, the very card-scence in Love Actually, the colors of the rainbow and etc. I mean you wouldn't want to enter a room and spot someone wearing the same top as you. All these, it raises your guard. I acknowledge that people will have the same interest and I'm just saying I'm uneasy about that.

~~I hurt myself.~~

because nobody knows I'm crying alone.

2006-12-26T13:53:00.000+08:00

Eyes behind shades, this necklace the reason

The everlasting Rain.

The next best thing about Rain, apart from the Korean Hearttrob, is tenderly cuddling up with your very own hearttrob in your very own bed. I never quite experience that. The Rain meaning plans being canceled and staying home.

Shan Ning Yong, please don't rain on me.

My house is infested with people, I don't have a proper room. I want back my own space and the times when hearttrob and I are alone at home doing what we very much like.

These are the things I want to get E

- Lifetime Love
- Lacoste
- Gap
- Gap
- TANKTOPS which she will burn
- Love
- Topshop
~~- Love~~
~~- Me~~
- Gap
~~- Tanktop~~
- Me-Charm Bracelet HAHA
- Penguin 8 cups a day water dispenser
- Time
- Me
- A New Year Magical Kiss

Because and no, I ain't perfect - nobody walking this earth's surface is

2006-12-24T14:15:00.000+08:00

I won't even wish for snow.

My internet connection failed me for the past two days. It was hell. It had been a week since I came back from KL, it was ultimate fun. I have alot of pictures but I'm too lazy to post.

It's christmas now. The only christmas presents I bought this year were for Su and her family. I got her a night light and the family a table light from Ikea because during christmas, it is the lightings that matters(My theory). I'm so broke this year and I can't sleep at night having to worry about how to get money to get Su her birthday present. =(

These are the things I want to get her

- Lifetime Love
- Lacoste
- Gap
- Gap
- TANKTOPS which she will burn
- Love
- Topshop
- Love
- Me
- Gap
- Tanktops
- Me
-Charm Bracelet HAHA

Okay, I'm ripping this off people's blog and I ought answer it my own.

List ten things you want to say to ten random people, but you know you never will say these things to them. Don’t say who the comment is meant for, and use people only once.

1. I wished you didn't exist, you're a hindrance to my life and happiness. Because of you, I have 5-10 mins of misery everyday. I always wanted to tell you, you're the ugliest I've ever met and will ever meet.

2. You don't deserve to give me such a cold and harsh treatment. It's not about I don't deserve you, it's about you don't deserve me. It's such a shame, so much for your oh-so-great love for me.

3. I miss you alot, when will I see you again. Maybe once upon a time, I liked you.

4. Me

5. I never had a a chance to say Thank you. Because of you, I did it.

6. I want to be your best friend.

7. You send me straight to Cloud Nine everytime I see you. You are my greatest love miracle. I want to go through this event called 'Marriage' with you.

8. If you approved, I have one less thing to worry about.

9. I love you.

10. You are shit and I hate you.

There you go bitches, now start guessing which one is for you.

Since young, I wanted my own Music Video like how the hollywood artist has. I want to be in Gwen Stefani's videos. I want to be a Harajuku Girl. Kawaiinehhhxxxxxxxx

I guess I'm bad this year because Santa is not giving me what I want.

Because all I want for Christmas is you.

2006-12-14T23:28:00.000+08:00

184 equivalent Half a Year.

As mentioned,

An indescribable Feeling and Pleasure
An Affection Heightened and Improved
By time

This is what 184 and Half a year equivalent to.

I love where I stand now, I wouldn't change it for the world. By far the best. =) Three Thumbs up.

So Here are the shots of a terrific anniversary.

First up- Botanical Gardens on a rainy day.

Then to Bugis For Hot Air Balloon

Today was magnificent.

I can't wait for tomorrow, off I go to KL for a short holiday. =)

2006-12-12T23:50:00.000+08:00

Last Christmas
And I can't wait for Holiday in KL. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

I'm going to buy Twin-Towers magnets and keychain for Shan. PEACE.

2006-12-10T21:52:00.000+08:00

World All Schools Runner-Up

Finally Touch Season is over, finally. This is my first trophy for the whole year. I gotso excited that I pushed everyone to get first in line BUT then I was shy so I went last in line. HAHA

Yes! An unannounced win for us today, coming in second in the tournament, having to be the only local school that was able to compete in the finals, right on.

There were numerous teams from South Africa and Australia respectively and it was a good exposure for the team once again in preperation for another league to come and like was mentioned, self improvement. I had never felt this much accomplised and deserved. Yayness. Hot Dives and Trys from the team. This is my new toy. Cute pink Australian Team. =)

THIS IS THE LOVE

And I find that the 'Peace Sign' is my new dope in pictures.

The world is nothing when I have The Love.

This is for I love you in every way

Happy 180th

2006-12-02T16:24:00.000+08:00

Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen.

Drama

Korean Drama to be more specific.

Let's see, I don't find a need to associate the term 'Drama' into every events just because one doesn't approve of the event, and specifically 'Korean Drama'. Why such terms like 'Chinese Drama', 'Japanese Drama', 'English Drama' aren't being used? Doesn't mean that spending time watching Korean Shows during leisure time will make one believe that life is likewise a Korean Show. It doesn't even make sense. Yes I may not be a rocket scientist or a creative genius but I know how to differeniate what is Television and what is not on.

And if one has watch enough Television shows of various nations, there are prominent similarities. Then, the usage of 'Korean Drama' would be biased.

I agree and accept that it is up to one's own perspective in such a context, therefore this is my own. You may agree, you may disagree or may sit on the fence, I don't really care.

I would like to buy more time.

I was deeply traumatised by what happened a few hours ago. I was sitting with E at my train station and some guy just jumped in front of an incoming train. I didn't see it with my own eyes, I just heard the sound of the body being dragged by the train. As though the bones were shattered into million pieces. I immediately took flight and cried. The scene is playing in my mind over and over again. Lucky I didn't have to witness it or I would just go insane.

I'm currently watching Prison Break and I declare that Wentworth Miller is the new sex. The show is so addictive and the script is great. That is what I call a rocket scientist's work.

2006-11-27T09:32:00.000+08:00

Girlfriends Society, Major Bitching Session Please

We self-proclaimed that we cannot look at cute thing cause it makes us look ugly.

Jokes aside, I have more important things to express.

It pretty funny and ironic how people works sometimes. I have no idea whether to cry or laugh. Yes you need to fall hard in order to learn, but is there any other alternatives? Not topping the to-do list this week is my biggest disappointment.
Depicts all.

2006-11-26T20:14:00.000+08:00

166th.
I'll go,

I wish I had more Time at hand. Then, making up for lost Time would be my most valuable hobby. I've been so busy with school and rugby, I hardly have space for my family and myself. If I could buy Time with cash, then I'll be a pauper. That is how desperate I am for getting more Time. I'll be more than happy if I were given 25 hours a day.

Home.

Which functions like a sleeping place for me. I get home only at bedtime and leave before the sunrise. I haven't had home-cooked family dinner for weeks. I see my brother less than three times a week, merely for a few minutes. Or the only time I see my mother is just to collect my allowance. I want to make up for my lost time at home. How very pathetic.

And lastly, if I had more time at hand. I would like to work and exchange the time for money.

Oh how very ironic.

Anyway, holidays are almost in meaning school is almost out. Greatness! or Yayness like how most would put it.

And love, I left a post-it note on your table.
This is how it goes.

Wherever you will go.

2006-11-23T09:23:00.000+08:00

Hello Love

So I had my first try at photography and this is what I've got.

Now I want to get my hands on photoshop. I'm so excited.

School really really really really suck big time. Yesterday, I took my time to come to school and I was almost an hour late. While strolling into school, E remembered that we had a science test that very morning and we totally missed it. Thanks, I'm so downgraded. And I received an email on the course transfering result. My request got rejected, thanks again. I'm going to pack my bags now and leave RP for good. Oh I'm such a wet blanket.

I'm putting my laptop on e-bay, anyone interested? There's one key missing though but you can easily call up Fujitsu and they'll fix it.

So since I missed the test, I decided to give school a miss too. So E and I set out for an adventure to Vivo City then to Sentosa but we never finished our journey. E claims we were backpacking. =) We ended up in Bugis shopping for dresses and tops. Then we head down to Novena to give Jiayan a visit in Starbucks. Thanks for the free drinks and food. More shopping done

ohhhhh, please confiscate my ATM card, will you baby?

Pictures now

Camp

Backpacking and Breadtalking
She says "peace"

Oh, can I go backpacking Europe with you?

2006-11-21T15:01:00.000+08:00

In Emotive Portraits

Holga and Lomo cameras are my lastest obsession. I want to master photography and photoshop. =)

I want to be the best photographer.

As our hearts beat as one, all perspective is lost

/edit

So many places to go, I wish I could buy time.

And I wish I could grow a whole field for you.

2006-11-15T21:32:00.000+08:00

Fifth - The strip tease you slipped into my coffee

Watched Material Girls today, it was pretty predictable and cliche.

Anyway, I cannot express how I feel about where I am at now, it's beyond description. It is an ultimate bliss. I never thought it was this real, I never thought love was this real. It is all too overwhelming to picture the advancement to the next stage, at the same time eager and thrilled. There are still certains issues we've yet to discover and places we've never been, and all these I know for sure I want to do it with you.

My parents find comfort in shifting house every 2-3 years. Sad to say, I'm moving. The decision is final. I don't see a point in moving when you are almost settled down. The whole process is tedious, needless to say, a hassle. I'm extremely unhappy and discouraged. I really am.

In my distressed state, school is any better.

oh I wished I was Harry Potter

2006-11-13T09:34:00.000+08:00

Burn the tiara, I don't need it.

Reality check then

Oops, the tiara is on my head.

On the contrary.

Jealousy and over possessive thingy is a trait in any relationship. You cannot deny it. Period

2006-11-07T09:02:00.000+08:00

All the ships have sunk

This week had been my most disappointing week.

All the late night conversations aren't great when they are disconnected with no goodbyes. Sleep had been horrendous, I find myself waking up every now and then with bad nightmares and repeatedly saying 'I'm sorry'. I am that miserable and strained.

My dissapointment in my friends isn't any better. What is a friend to you when they judge you based on a mistake that I did or didn't make. And also, to judge with the lack of understanding and knowledge. Knowing human nature, its hard not to judge and take sides of the person who is supposedly in the right, or even bitch. I'm so emotionally strained of everything and I want a chance to redeem myself and give myself personal space and time. If that is as good to them as giving up, then it just shows how much they regard me as a person.

And also many more. I refuse to go on as it would make things worse and unfair, espcially when it involves publicity.

Well, at least I've got my ethics correct.

Can I hold on to you?

2006-10-31T08:47:00.000+08:00

Broken key, yet to fix.

Yesterday's chat with sexy agony had indeed made me even more depressed. I've decided that in times like these, I would much rather lead a reclusive existence. For the first time, I am ashamed of myself and I do not have enough courage to face everyone, just yet.

It's funny how people only remember the bad things and not the good things. There is never a time that when a good thing happen to someone and they'll go " oh I need a day to get over it, it's too good to be true " but always, without fail they'll go " I need days to get over it " when bad things do happen. I only agreed to it because I needed a break from my disgusted self.

I was told by sexy agony that relationships are never of equilibrium. She also told me it would be an early sign of caution if I were to hide my emotions from my partner. It's always better to be more truthful. But they say the truth hurts. Oh what a paradoxical statement.

For once, in many nights, sleep was unpleasant.

2006-10-31T00:49:00.000+08:00

276, it is.

Once again I've lost.

2006-10-24T19:02:00.000+08:00

I feel like I'm a poor man and you're the queen.

One word summarized it all

GLOAT

Stash of countless photographs and hearts.
This commitment I've made to you is heartfelt and unquestionable
At least, this is how I feel.

Erasing the heading,
Rewriting it

You're queen, and that makes me king.

My weekends are enjoyable with my two most favourite person in the world. Maybe just one and not the other. The other by the name of Shan is a slut. Sorry Honey, but the truth hurts. HAHA.

"that's hot, loves it" qouted paris hilton.

Here are the pictures where Shan and I had some family time with Su.

The attempted murder of ee-yor while Su is out.
LE mermaid

I can't take the distance

2006-10-19T12:46:00.001+08:00

Going for profundity

My week hasn't been all that great. I greet every morning with a rise and whine instead of a rise and shine. For the past few days, I've been wallowing myself in a depressive state. Living in self-doubt, failing to believe in my inner self and experiencing the psychological pain of regret, shame, and guilt shot me in the head, smearing blood all over my face. Whenever I feel or see pain, I take flight immediately, seeking self-deception. In the same way you would immediately remove your hand from a hot stove;- avoiding pain.

Using the misery as a catalyst for self-improvement, diminishing misery and restoring happiness is easier said than done. This is where the phase of learning comes into play.

4 months of intensity,depth and devotion built, going for profundity. Like you're not ready for goodbye, goodbye is non-existent to me.

I must not be demanding
I must not be demanding
I must not be demanding
I must not be demanding
I must not be demanding
I must not be demanding
I must not be demanding
I must not be demanding
I must not be demanding
I must not

Writing lines like I never wrote before.

2006-10-13T20:46:00.000+08:00

I feel the rhythm of your body close to mine.

This is going to be a random post. When I was young and naive, I always wanted to have a slow-dance to a romantic music with the love of my life. Typical I know. Last year, I slow-danced with the Prom King by the poolside to Beauty and The Beast. One may perceive that it's the most romantic ambiance, but trust me, it was beauty and the beast indeed. However, the tides changed, 2 days ago I finally had what I've been waiting for since I was a little girl. It was the most idealistic and tender. It was with my greatest love of all time.

I need more Korean Dramas please.

2006-10-02T11:02:00.000+08:00

Red suspenders, my slut.

I've been doing massive online shopping that it's eating up my food and travelling expenses.
School is a bore,as usual. I don't like half of my facilitators. I only like them when they award me A. I am losing my blogging mojo so I'll just upload pictures.
Say hello to my Hairdresser. I think I need to cut my hair like real soon.
Okay my life has been pretty boring. School training school training. I need a break. There are some people that I really dislike. =(

But to everyone else and espcially E and billy:
Happy Children's day everyone.

2006-09-24T11:44:00.000+08:00

anyword harsher than reject?

I feel like a complete idiot and a pathetic reject. Familly issues.

Yesterday my partner broke down because I refused to eat Mcdonalds with my partner. There's two things that you cannot mess with my partner - food and television. The CEO of the girlfriend's club noted.

E also broke down last night becuase of family and time issues. "I would love to give you 25 hours a day but I'm not capable of doing so " . Maybe Cheryl would like to help since she has the reputation of a genie, boring one instead.

Two days back in school, it was horrible. MSN gets me through the day. I have to adapt to working in a new enviroment and with new individuals. There's alot of things I do not like about my new classmates. Firstly, they are too quiet, un-fun and so not humorous for their own good.

Enough said, pictures I've promised.

shan's deprived childhood.
MCDONALDS

We all met up to get our hair tamed except me. Shopping with them is always fun. I'm so in love with Jessica new hair (only when it's scorpioned) She's such a fake ang moh.

Overdued BBQ pictures.
That's all. Good morning

2006-09-20T00:28:00.000+08:00

I love my weekdays but I want to love my weekends too.

Somehow insecurities took a toll on me. I feel bugged and insecure about something which I don't know what about. I am fully aware that I demand and acquire alot in a relationship, I do want the attention that I can possibly get. I need more than occasional hugs and constant reassurance. But if you are unable to pleasure me, it doesn't make you a horrible partner. The whole idea wasn't to make you feel like you're not good enough for me or to put one in a bad light. Today, I made my partner break down in front of me. Now look who's the bad and horrible one. I am a highly sensitive person as well. What happens when the two people feel that they are not good enough for each other when they are oblivious that they are? At least, that's how I feel. I will never ask for better or more. Like E says, I'm rich with love. I am one happy girl.

And also how some thoughts which you think are insignficant. As long as the thought is planted in your mind and that it's bothering you in a small or a large extent, it is considered significant and shouldn't be neglected. They are millions out there but you're one in a million.

These few days, I had massive arguements with my mother about money. She feels that I'm spending more than she's earning. Today I was in the bus and I saw this mother pocketing $2 to her daughter who was dressed in her Primary School uniform. Does it mean that we are 10 years older meaning our pocket money is multiplied by 10? Oh yes I wished. I need a job, sadly.

What we usually do after trainings - Eating two meals a meal, doing ridiculous things. Going to everyone house to raid their fridge and make a mess in their rooms.
Shan must be sick in her head to take a naked picture of me. Kill the paparazzi please.

We all went over to Sheryl's house after training, raided her fridge and room. This is what I mean by eating two meals a meal.

Freak Number 1 - Eating two bowls

Freak Number 2 - Shan said I looked as if I ate from a fishtank.
Freak Number 3 - Steals food

Blogger is dying out. I have more pictures to upload. I can't be bothered. I'll post more pictures tomorrrow when I'm back in school.

2006-09-18T14:00:00.000+08:00

Monday blues and neglect are the words.

Sometimes I wished I was a toy with a smile fixed on me.
Even with toys, there are sad toys like sad bean. Sometimes it seems to me that being sad is a bad thing.

2006-09-17T17:04:00.000+08:00

The saddest part of a broken heart isn't the ending so much as the start.

Disclaimer to the previous entry - It wasn't me.

Okay I am feeling very cranky now. My week had been filled without alot of varsity matches and killer trainings which explained my sleep-deprived and exhuasted state. I've also done alot of shopping(online) last week, now I'm badly off. My mother refuses to give me allowance or to pay for my transport fee. Speaking of transportation, it takes up more than half of my money. Transportation is very pricey in Singapore, and also I feel that my money is not worth when I cannot get a good seat in the vehicle or if it is packed with inconsiderate commuters. ( I am not trying to sound cheapskate here ) Speaking of INCONSIDERATE commuters, having to travel with those who play their music out loudly in the trains is my biggest transport peeves. It makes me feel like chucking my Sennheiser earpiece into their snobbish faces.

It is raining heavily now. I hate the sound of wind howling through my windows. I am very afraid of thunder and lightnings. But I like raining days without a thunderstorm. Sometimes I have this thing about rains. I classify rains and I still do not know how I came up with the different type of rains.There is this kind of rain that puts me in hibernation(typical). And also, there's one ,which comes once in a blue moon, that makes me have this urge to get my pencils and colors ready and paint a picture. There is also a kind of rain which makes me cry.

I realised that the word "bitch" is being used too often for its own good. Like how people go,

"Prelim's such a bitch"
"you're such a bitch"
"the pain is hurting like a bitch"
"Peter was being a bitch"
"Mary is crying like a bitch"
"Hey bitch"
"fuck off bitch"
"move bitch"
or simply
"BITCH!"

It kind of loses its meaning and class. It's been too widely and abusively used. And it is starting to sound annoying.

My progress of "Five people you meet in heaven" is going really slow. I'm still at the fourth person, his wife. I rate this book one of the best story books I've read this year. School is going to recommence this thursday- oh how exciting huh. I'm really dreading it, school is such a disgusting place like E claimed. I don't like the idea of self-introductory sessions and getting accustom to each other working styles all over again. On the other hand, I do want a new set of fresh faces and facilitators to start my first day in Semester two. As much as I like familiar faces but it is not ideal for this situation.

Over the week, I also come to realisation that I am a very sensitive person. And when I am at my lowest, I tend to be what I call 'too sensitive for my own good'. I still have alot to learn and alot more bad habits to kick.

At Cheryl's house stayover, when everyone else was in bed.

Cheryl : Hey let's play Bingo now.
Me( so excited) : Huh now?
Su: WHY?
Cheryl: So the loser sleeps with wathone.

E says I'm a monster who bugs anyone in arms length as long as I am not alseep. Thanks Cheryl for the bingo, I feel like a reject.

And also this whole week, I took the train home with my beautiful girl. (=

While doing art and crafts with E, I spilled the colors and the whole masterpiece got into a mess

Me: Fuck, I'm such a disaster.
E: Yes, a beautiful one indeed.
Me(silently) :AAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

And in Leona words: And.... it's 88 days before she's home with my Supre clothes. (=

( I can't seem to upload my LOVE, THE BOMB finale picture)

2006-09-17T15:47:00.000+08:00

At ease.

-Ihaveanabnormallyfatass invades-

And I feel my world coming back to life
My eyes are finally open again
Now I see it all in a different light standing on the outside
I'm finally on the outside looking in.

Here's something I recalled Wathone saying to me yesterday on the field:

"Nothing beats Rugby, I love it, its my PASSION"

(Mind You, she had a really committed look drawn on her face that even the swear pores cant contain their excitement, that girl sure loves rugby more than Me) Anyway, the past week had been a demanding one for the team, with Wathone nursing her injured feet/ankle, but you know her, her refusal to take a break from training to take good care of herself (can be really infuriating) just aggravates the pain further.

"No, I can I can run!"

As she just forces herself to perform on an injured leg.

Tell her, (because she refuses to acknowledge the fact that she isnt alright, pfft what a stonehead) that she has needs to stop training and nurse her leg first.

To sum this up, Wathone loves Shan Sheryl En and everyone else especially Billy.

A little side tracking, I swear Im this ugly.

"Help me quit my daily wantings of stuffing myself with fries, I need a runway for a belt"

I'm holding on for You.

2006-09-13T21:49:00.000+08:00

lll A fire still rages.

Your heart has a beauty that I find in no other.
We produced a true love out of our infatuation.
What began as a spark of simple desire,
Was kindled into blazing flames of passionate fire.
And a fire that still rages.

2006-09-08T02:16:00.000+08:00

There is no ugly flower in the world.

Grief touches all of us. It may be because of a death of a loved one, a loss of a job or tragic events beyond our control. Death is inevitable. It’s scary how someone just leaves permanently and you know they are never coming back. My friend’s mother passed away last week, it was a sudden death. In a span of two days, all her brain cells were pronounced dead and she was surviving on a machine until they decided to let her go in peace. My deepest condolences. Then it struck me, it made life seemed so fragile. Life is like a clock. We are born, grow up and die according to our biological clock. On top of that, the actor in my Korean drama died too, so did Crocodile Hunter. Moreover, I’m reading 5 people you meet in heaven now. Do you want to know when you’re going to leave?

Abby: My lonesome nights outnumber my days, till you’re coming home.

On a lighter note:

2006-09-06T20:56:00.000+08:00

keep our fire burning no matter how many miles may separate us

"And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation."
--Kahlil Gibran

Fathom this, fathom my love for you.
For now, it is aeroplanes and Bon Voyage.

Till you are coming home.

2006-09-05T21:17:00.000+08:00

the two of us alone together.

I've not been religiously updating my space. Let's see what I've done over the weeks. As I am really really lazy to type, let the pictures do the talking once again. ( This post will be Hyhder's disappointment )

So School holidays are in, I find myself doing nothing except spending all my time with E. Suddenly, my world revolves around E. Yet, still I can't get enough of E.

Apart for that, I've been very busy with KRUNK. (I know it's over) It's such a chore trying to get everyone to pay up for tickets and other expenses. Money was spent faster than lightning. Getting around places and getting a bottle of mineral water for $4! Daylight extortion. Okay more about KRUNK later.

Sunday I went to the Blacks midnight sevens and met Su's family there. Her father is the most humorous dad I've ever met. I like humorous daddys. Her little brother is so hot that I'm in love with him. Dinner was with her and her two brothers. The elder brother was so annoying I swear. " oh when you go out with me, you don't need coupons " -roll eyes-.

Thursday I met Su's friends Lizard and Cockroach with Sheryl. We went to town after going back to their school. THANKS EMELINE FOR THE ~~ROSE~~ half eaten LEAF. We had Lunch at Burger King with my coupons. Shan and her friend came over, followed by Jiayan. I love Yong Shan Ning alot. I see me in her and her in me. They call us bad girls but I call us double trouble. I always have fun when I'm with Shan. I even have a special folder in my computer named " FUN WITH SHAN" and all the pictures taken with her are there.
Meet emo Lizard-Mei Yan
AND COCKCROACH-Tanny
Okay KRUNK was overall enjoyable. We made profit for the rugby fund. yayness. No much pictures taken because we were busy running around. Stayed over at En's place. I love En's place and the maid. That is my third home. Without much sleep, we head off to turf city in her dad's car (her dad is another funny one) and played NTL against SRC. It was exhuasting. We were practically falling asleep and walking like zombies but we played well. (familiar huh su?)
We went to Gombak Garden before heading to Shan's place. We felt like some tourist.
Okay no more pictures. Trainings are a killer I swear. Now we have extra physical training twice a week. Half of my week is filled with trainings.

And Here's to the night.

I find myself eating 3 apples almost everyday.

2006-08-27T00:58:00.000+08:00

Aaaaaabbbbbbbyyyy:

2006-08-26T23:14:00.000+08:00

Your say, My say, Her say.

I have a good friend by the name of Garfield. As much as I want to listen to what she wants to say, I choose not to. I can never fathom her mind. I don't like how she beats around the bush and don't come straight to the point. I don't like her giving me a million apologies because when "sorry" is used too many a times, it starts to loose its meaning. Classic huh? I miss the old Garfield I've known a few weeks back. The one at borders, esplanade, supercuts, school talks, sleepovers, night cycling, playgrounds, 7-11s, birthdays and Suntec. I don't like the now Garfield, the one at mamak shops trying to buy ciggerattes, walking behind the few of us reading newspaper, the one who doesn't eat, who drowns herself with emo songs and thinks she's so pathetic. I've always said to you my dear friend, you're so much stronger than that. My faith in you can move the mountains. But you choose to disappoint me. My point is I like sane cats.

Hearing the claims that You go on your long winded streak of apologies just puts me off. Like what W said the other time, your desperate attempts are "disgusting". I'm sorry to even say this. We aren't even trying to be hypocritical where we bitch about you behind your back, because in this case, we don't. Clearly, we can differ what is and what isn't.

We have each, in a way or two or even in a million ways or another had tried drilling in messages that projects only one statement "We care". Now, we don't. You fucked yourself real bad trying to fit in with the smoking and attention seeking self of yours. You have no clue how much we resent the person you've became.

Accept.

That is all you can say. Face up to your own dirty deeds to yourself. We know what that one word comprehend. And we have accepted the fact that You do smoke cause Hey, I used to smoke and now I've quit cause W wasn't happy. Why did I do it, you can ask (only to shoot yourself in the foot real hard) why? Because she's the one person who means a lot to me. And if in that tiny shallow head of yours which I and the rest believe does contain a certain level of common sense and self respect, you can deduce what I'm trying to say. Ultimately, You don't care about yourself like we care about you. You don't give two hoots about ruining you're already screwed up life. So fuck off.

Anyway, at the same time. "At times I do it for attention, sometimes, I just smoke because I want to." Ask your little hollow brain again, what the underlying reason is again. Its your self exaggerated problems that you blow up so enormously every time. Your own fears of people leaving. Now I begin to understand why they leave. And can We safely conclude that it is because of Your own actions that drive people away. Like how you get so clingy sometimes, and how you drop evident hints that you want to be invited out and how you just try to digress when people are trying to make your feel better.

Forget about the rest, W and I are the only two who have spent so much time with you and through what we've seen, We don't mean a thing but objects to propel the needed attention you gravely lack.

You are a smoker, yes you are. Others may not be alright with it but I am. However its pathetic how I see you get an "orgasm" at the word "cigarette" It leaves us in utter dismay and disgust, please. Yet you still claim, "I will stop I will stop" and please, quit paying lip service just to pacify our ears because we have heard enough of it and we know what your intentions are for every remark that flies off your lips and every nonverbal means of communication you shoot at us. We learn the way you are, and we try to help, but you make us resent you instead.

This isn't a matter of us understanding You or trying to accept. This is about you, changing. You cannot deny we have tried everything but you planned to turn a deaf ear on us. Face it, "I'm sorry" cant work anymore. Because, We do accept your smoking habits (soil your tomorrows then) but we cant accept the way you are acting. Believe me, this goes more than smoking, its how rude you have turned, the way you carry yourself.

So you think it's fucking cool to shake your leg and raise your voice like you do now. Fuck, Uncool you needs a straight lesson on being proper.

Jy, quit being a fuckhead.

2006-08-25T19:23:00.000+08:00

When we turned off the lights.

The holidays started. I skipped my last two days of school which I was pretty reluctant. End of semester signifies the change of classes. And I wouldn't be able to have lessons with my classmates anymore. This is sad. I hate it when we have to face a new enviroment and people and start the ever-so-boring self-introductions. I like familiar places and people.

This week's enterprise lesson is about change and how you deal with them. I think it is something that everyone can closely relate to. If you've realised, everybody (including you and I) is undergoing change every single day. Be it physical, emotional, mental or spiritual, change is inevitable. Out of all the lessons, I think that lesson was the only sane lesson I've been in. If I were to ask everyone around if they like change, without hesitation, a chorus reponse of "we hate change" will be spitted right back at me. No matter how one detest change, we cannot avoid them. It's like a vicous cycle we all yearn to break. There is no way to make people like change, but you can make them feel less threatened by it. Times, people, things change but we change with them.

This class I will miss. ( I know all you see is my face but that makes up to the class picture that you all took on the last day of school when I weren't present in class)
I made two very good friends in this class. Let me introduce them to you.
Say hello to SHAH hyhder. (I know I always spell your name wrongly.) I have to put up with this guy's bodybuilding politics and 10eggs a day diet. Isn't he sexy? And also imagine me putting up with his nonsense techno songs and ridiculous videos on youtubes which consists of ballets and gay stuff. And he is the biggest fan of my blog, I'm sure of that. I love it when he dances to "drop it like it's hot" , "get low" and the infamous Chicken Little tune.
And say hello to Cheryl. I have to put up with her wise advices. I don't like her because she doesn't laugh at my jokes. =( She watches 5566 J-pop dramas on youtube and plays ridiculous games with the guys. And she promised to give me her FBTs for free. yayness.

damn I have weird friends.

Anyway, moving on. I had my English Olevels Oral on tuesday which was pretty okay and then training. Thanks Sheryl Su and Jiayan for coming along with me and waiting. =)
Sorry no photos for tuesday, I know you fans out there beri beri sad. But I'll entertain you still.
I really had fun on Wednesday with Su, Shan and Jessica. We went to Cheenatown early in the morning to get lightsticks for Krunk@sentosa. I felt like I am out on an excursion with me holding onto a hand-drawn map and Jessica being the tour-guide.
The poor girl had to suffer when we made attempts to doll her up with Shan's make-up. She look so f-pretty after the extreme make-over.
Credits goes to Shan's Sony Ericsson and her fine arty farty skills in collages. We ate like gluttons when we were out. We splurge on chicken rice at Fareastplaza where Shan and I had second servings of Chicken Rice. Then we walked to Cineleisure and had a meal of burgerking shared amongst the four of us while doing the krunk logistics. Then over to Rocky Master where we rockers had cakes, cup noodles, famous amos and drinks. Poor tiny stomachs. The day was well-spent.

Su stayed over my house and then we went training next morning which was a killer. Some of us didn't bring their own water bottles. Soon, we all ran out of water. We had people crying out feebly for water while Su, Shan and I hid a big bottle of cold water inside our bags. We were smart enough that if we took it out, it'll be gone in a flash of light. It was hilarious to be so secretive and giving each other mischevious eye-contacts. Soon, the field manager went to get a bottle of water from 7-11. As though it was a water ration or desert. Everyone ran to her for water while the three of us hid behind the truck and drank ours. HA-HA

Okay now overdued pictures of me going to Malaysia with my parents.
Okay that's all.
I want to make love to you till the sun rises and sets .

2006-08-22T23:31:00.000+08:00

I like sane people with no tar.

Attention. Everyone is deprived of it. Without a doubt, I'm certain myself that I do need and want attention too. However sometimes, attention getting is widely overused and misused. And in this reactive state, you are always presuming separation, the absence of attention, having to struggle to get attention and to get into a pleasurable state. You struggled and connived so much so that when you don't get the attention you needed or wanted, you divert and get involved with other typical things like cigarettes, alcohol. The more you are given the attention, the more demanding you become. It is like an addiction you can't easily get out of. Maybe one feels superior when attention is given to them. All I know is I've got alot of unwanted attention which might be wanted attention to someone else. haha.

Speaking of cigarettes and tar. It's not like I resent smokers, I just feel that it is redundant to do something and be terrified of getting caught for it. An advice for those coward losers, get a life, or rather get a smoke-free life. I'll be thankful for your sanity.

Now now, I've got truckloads of pictures to entertain you bitches.

Friday - Town

I still got alot more pictures to upload for town but i'm lazy to put them into collages.

Moving on. Saturday - NTL

School is coming to an end, I like. Training today, Shan and I pretend we are hot sexy korean models for a car exhibition. After training, I got my ass down to my cousin's place for dinner and I was served with a plate full of annoyance and laughters.

That's not the end, I still have like 2945345 pictures more to go. Either blogger or my internet connection is being a bitch.

So that's all for now. Good night.

2006-08-21T12:05:00.000+08:00

A book with a bold heading.

I cant get enough.

2006-08-20T00:46:00.000+08:00

33 hours

Tonight, I took the train home with a beautiful bitch.

2006-08-16T11:03:00.000+08:00

Night walks and carparks. (disclaimer- this post is going to drown with pictures.)

My week has been great. I'm too lazy to type everything out. So let the pictures do the talking.

Night cycling and prata on a friday night.

Then I burned and was burnt on Saturday at NTL.

Sunday was with the Jiayan and Su.
The one in the center always smiles.

So after a whole week of skipping school/class. Now I'm back in school.
That's all the visual for the past week bitches.

2006-08-11T10:09:00.000+08:00

Hidden puns and lies

Jealousy is a game we play, it is highly inevitable. That's when insecurities and doubts are aroused alongside. It is indeed ugly and it soils the tomorrow worse than all the tobacco add together. Being reserved only heightens the tension. Maybe I'm someone who needs to digged out with a spade. Staying determined and not letting it bring one down is the way to go around it.

So, I've been phyiscally, mentally, emotionally abusing E for quite some time. I need to make it all go away, whatever it takes.

I'm on a skipping spree this whole week. Su and Jiayan are what I call bad influence, making me come out of my ~~rebellious~~ shell(pun intended). I missed a whole week of school and lessons. School feels so unfamiliar to me, I don't like.

diverting from the main point. Here's a little something.

If there is a place beyond the stars,
That is the place you want to be.
Though tough it seems To reach there,
But one who believes
Can always achieve.

This goes out to you my dearest step winter friend. Just follow your heart and then everything else will fall right into place. You'll soon find your purpose in life.Let your mind lead the way. You never know where it will take you. If it takes you somewhere good, then good for you. But if it leads you somewhere bad, the only outcome of it is that by the end of the day, you will end up being a stronger person and more able to deal with the next rollercoster it leads you to.

2006-08-07T05:58:00.000+08:00

Well, content loves the silence.

It's a pity and a crying shame that "the past" pulled me down again. It makes me wanting to hide from the viscous world. And that also lead me to my depressive state whereby self-disappointment overwhelmed my sanity and the tendency to shut everything and everyone out. In spite of all these, I was told that life is sweet. And it's high time that I should accept.

Apart from that. My week had been great. I skipped class on Wednesday and end up at the school library eating, surfing the net, dota-ed and then E came over. And I'd skipped school on Friday and E came over, we had a movie marathon in the comforts of my bed. I pretty much enjoyed the week.

Tuesday after training... ( Food keeps the Ruggers happpyyy )

Saturday was the NTL pre-game at Turf City. It was an eye opener and I was disappointed with myself. Oh wells. Then Wilson took me on his bike (it was traumatising I swear) and we head down to Shan's beautiful home for a swim, dinner and drinking.

Cheryl and I wore couple t-shirts and cam-whored while Su pathetically wants to be a part in it. Needless to say, Shan's fugly chippedoffpaint fingernails intruded too. (Shan please change the color lahh. I seen it since that Bridging Lifes meeting lor. I'm not surprised if it had been there ever since.)

(I am going to drown this post with pictures)

I look retardedly fugly here.

And then I took the train home with a beautiful girl. That's all for Saturday night.

Sunday I woke up and I was desperate for a haircut. I dragged Jiayan along. The whole trip, she was complaining about how she hates my bushy hair and how she can't find my face through it. The first cut was of no difference to my previous hair so I requested the guy to cut again. And with Jiayan exclaiming "shorter shorter", it got really short.

And I took the train home without the beautiful girl, that's all for Sunday.

The blue sky is out, I'm off to school. Monday blues, here I come.

2006-07-31T22:47:00.000+08:00

Best-Worst Happy Birthday Wathone.

I always have this resentment towards birthdays. I will not go too in depth about it. They always go " birthdays are a happy day/special day/significant day. I like to think otherwise.

THE GOOD.
Sometimes, small gestures do wonders. Thanks babygirl Shan, Jiayan, Su, Jessica and Cheryl.
This year, I had a quiet and pleasant birthday. I would like to call it "the ultimate getaway". So theultimategetaway did lift my resentment towards birthdays. I couldn't be more appreciative than I already am.

THE BAD.
As if it's not traumatizing enough. Picture a room with your brother playing the computer, your parents screaming at each other and a soiled cake on the floor. That was how my birthday ended with me drowning in my tears. For that, I'm not going to lay my fingers on any cakes, ever.

okay enough about that. Visuals (with overdued pictures.)

Shan's little birthday gesture for me.. (awww i lublub eeuu)

In Shan's words - They are what get me through the day =).

I find myself pretty miserable. This is because I realized that I have nothing to hold on to from the past, be it relationship, friends, best friend etc. As if my past had been totally erase with the memories I still hold. I've been jerked into the fast moving lane where I'm always going forward and never looking back. Yes some say it's a good thing, moving on. I look at the people around me, all new faces. I don't have a sense of belonging here, whatever happened to the familiar faces I've used to recognize. Whatever happened to all those hours laughing on the floor with A. You’re still my bittersweet knocking me off my feet. Letting go was never my intention and you were the top of the list I’ve expected a greeting from. But always, the first thing you want never comes. I’m still in disappointment. These are the phases of life, I accepted.

On a much lighter note.
Now let us take a walk down memory lane and look at the timeline of my hamsters.

So on Mothers’ day, I bought 2 hamsters for my mummy – Hammy and Hammer.
They gave birth to 3 babies and only 2 survived. ( Little Hammy and Hammer. )
They were given away.
They gave birth again to 6 babies and all survived ( I got too lazy to name anyway )
Then Hammer escaped and is still missing in action ever since.
Hammy killed 2 of her children on my birthday night.
Then she gave birth to another 3 babies just this morning.

E calls her THE BABY MAKING MACHINE. Haha. Personally, I don’t like animals but I don’t hate them.

So the aftermath of the birthday. My Mummy tried to make it up to me.

awwww. Take a closer look at

She was at the door and presented me with this. I saw the three letter on the retarded stars she tried to make. They were I , V and U. So I asked her what is I.V.U. And she did the korean drama mama love I usually do for Shan and E. Ohhh my adorable Mummy. She've got the korean drama mama fever too!

So Su tried to be funny when I asked her to buy my a handphone, bicycle and a Lomo camera for my birthday.

Okay now the overdued pictures. ( shopped over the past weekend.)

So now the ultimategetaway.

Aeroplanes and bicycles.

2006-07-23T21:41:00.000+08:00

~~best~~ weekend.

So much for anticipating weekends. I am highly disappointed in my parents. My mother promised a shopping trip and fine dining. Instead, I found myself waking up in an almost empty house on a Saturday afternoon and talking to the only available living thing in my house - my hamsters. There were nothing edible in my house that I almost resort to eating up my hamsters, all I found was deadly expired milk and bread. So that's how my Saturday got wasted.

Sunday wasn't too good either. I woke up to my Father's constant ranting on Money. Shopping with Shan, Jess and Narene made me feel a little better. I want to buy dressestopsskirtsshoesslippersbagsaccessoriesdressestopstopstopsdresses. I am officially bankrupt now so I need my sugar mummy to pay for all my wants which I think will take months for her to be free to go shopping with me again. So meanwhile, I shall indulge myself in onlineshopping. I found so many lovely stuff but I'm so doubtful of the sizings. I used to be an onlineshopping addict and half of the stuff I buy, it doesn't fit.

So I've ordered this top which I doubt I will wear.

Brown or White? Both are equally nice. Valarie loves them too but we cannot get our sizes. =(

I WANT!!!!!! BUT NO MOOOLAHHHHH.. I want to wear to Bintan. =(Speaking of weekends and shopping. I realised that next weekend is my birthday. No more sweet sixteen. =( I never liked brithdays. Maybe I'll like this birthday if I am given a shopping spree.

I desperately need a haircut too. I was so irritated with it that I coiffured my own tresses. It's so horrible. I just happily snip snip with the layering scissors and it is really horrible. I need to make a trip down to the hairdresser and get it fixed. For now, I'm not going to let my hair down.

I have so much things to say but I can't be bothered typing it out. But it all sums up to BURN THE TIARA.

I want to be able to spend more time with you. I want to be all you ever needed.

2006-07-21T14:08:00.000+08:00

This week has been really exhuasting but I can say I'm contented(nightwalks). I am deprived of sleep, food, love, money and what not. I need to go on a strict diet, I've been eating way too much for my little stomach and all i see now is flabs appearing. I'm too exhuasted to do anything, let alone blogging. I need sleep!

okay whatever bitches, I'm too tired and lazy to type so I hope the visuals will entertain you.

so , we had nothing to do while we WAITED for SU for 3 hours. We started chilling out at 7-11. I realised that the 7-11 in RP is the only one that has wireless connection. Ha-Ha. Me, trying to step korean by eating korean noodles with winter clothing.

My field partner and I. heee
Rp is really beautiful at night. It is so peaceful and doesn't feel like a school, I like. I feel that I'm too pampered by RP that I can't go anywhere where there is no aircon, no wireless connection and no laptop.
Oh, how our conversations excites and stimulates me.

Now, FUN WITH SHAN BABYGURL

2006-07-18T15:01:00.000+08:00

Doubts and insecurities flowed alongside.

Watching Korean Drama can be really depressing. Sometimes, when you cry along with the series, you don't really know if you are crying just because the actors and actresses are crying or that you can relate your life to a korean drama series-depressing. Everyday, I come to school, put on the headset and drown myself with Korean Drama. I'm getting sick of teamwork. I feel that I go to school just to freeload the comfort- food,aircon,wireless and electricity.

For the longest time, I haven't talk about love. Cupid finally shot. I find myself expressing my innermost feelings to E. It’s those beautiful eyes, my gateway to paradise. It's the happiest I've ever been. You give me the most amazing feelings inside, the feeling of being in love with you. Sappy love songs and classic love letters, show me it's real now.

Meet me by the water tonight?
I have everything in store for you.

With my hands over your shoulder, a meaningless movement but a movie script ending.

2006-07-14T23:29:00.000+08:00

E : Oh so now I'm your rubbish bin, your rag... etc...
P : You are everything, to me.
( awkward silence)

okay now the visual entertainment.

The Korean drama fans in red waiting for Rain

Me and my babygurl Shan.
<3<3<3

2006-07-13T09:31:00.000+08:00

People come, People stay, People go .

Being in emotional pain is anguishing enough. Compounding the pain by keeping it all to yourself is even worse. I've been there and done that. Putting on that facade doesn't help much either. That was what I've learnt from E. From my point of view, I supposed we keep our pain to ourselves because we might be a burden to our friends and family(which is usually not the case). So a friend, C told me about what she is going through at the moment. Then I realised that I am also going through the same thing and yet I was readily available, dropping everything and lending a loving ear to her. So C, please stop thinking that you are a burden.
There are people out there who care about you. I know, 50 other people are saying the same thing to you about how they won’t leave and how they will be there for you but out of 50, there's surely one that your can solely trust. (E, how ironic right?)

As I watched C trying to deny every torment she is in, running away and avoiding the situation. Yet she has a front on, smiling and laughing at every small little thing, trust me it was not a pretty sight. Then, I realized what a coward I was then. Running away never really helps. So dear C, I know it’s a vicious cycle but face it, let the brewing coffee spill and don’t let it scream back at you. Build up your crumbled world slowly.

Last night, I was going through my conversation logs with R. I realized how much I missed her. Good times perpetually etched in my mind. The good times definitely outweigh the bad. But what were the reasons for goodbye. Is that door permanently closed? It will remain a void.

Picture that girl from O.C , Marissa Cooper. Picture her dying and leave the O.C forever. I swear I cried like a bitch when I saw her in anguish in that car crash. As if it was real. So there is already a Save Marissa Campaign on-going. 45 000 signatures were raised in the petition. I bet that only in O.C you are given a second chance to live or that you can bring death to life.

Korean dramas are the new black. I find myself indulging in Korean dramas once again. School is still a bore. The only things that keep me going through 8.30-4 is my laptop, Korea dramas laptop and food. I’m skipping school too often this week. I need to pull up my smelly socks.

Let me introduce my Sugar Daddy.
Trying to step emo.

okay that's all. I want to watch my korean drama and be a drama mama.

2006-07-11T10:35:00.000+08:00

Staring at the half-eaten sandwich on my table.

I find myself in the dark room, all alone. It's that destructive room where people turn to for space to think or to fill some void in their life. When I am safe and sound in that room, a whole gamut of emotions started to overwhelm me. In my sleep deprived state, I'm having too many commitments and too much partying, it really wears one down and leaves one feeling frazzled. So, all alone in the dark room reaching out for that one reliable hand that will pull me out of all these. I really need this.

People often asked me if I am fine. My replies are I am when I am not. I don't want people to see me as a sourpuss and a drag to be around. So that's when facade and fronts come into the picture, I think.

So I've promised pictures, here they go.
I love candy floss and balloons. Heee!!!! <3Shan and I were swooning over him. ahhh He is so HOT!. I am so smitten. =D

Okay Darrell owes me pictures and I've yet to scan the polariods.

2006-07-10T21:07:00.000+08:00

It seems like I woke up beneath a different sky.

I had a hectic weekend. I had to attend like 3 birthday parties in which two of them clashes. I went for Owen's and my Bestie's. I got wasted real bad. It was a nightmare I want to erase, everything was oddly surreal. I was at my lowest and I felt so vulnerable. All I could remember was people yelling and screaming at the subconcious me.

With trepidation, I ventured into the dark and empty room.
I felt the glare of some sinister force, it was piercing.
I've yet to see daylight.

Sunday, we had this project bridge thingy in school so we went to help out. It was fun, I had a great time. I did not get the chance to explore the school (cause nobody asked me along) while the rest did. =( While they were wandering aimlessly around the school, Wilson and I got the whole cinema to ourselves. It felt really great, watching movie with the theatre totally empty. The atmosphere was really great. Shan, Eugene and Owen joined and we started to tap dance, line dance and every stupid dance we could think of. We started racing up the steps and down. We all went back to RPC, eating like gluttons and playing with the walkie-talkies. Then we played hide and seek cum catching. It always brings back feelings of nostalgia; - block catchings, playgrounds, hide and seek. I miss childhood. So Shan Cheryl and I were running like mad women. We hid in this room full of goodie bags. On our way out to our second hide out, we stole the bags. We got caught too soon. Sadly, the game ended. I went to look for that silly whiny girl, okay I didn't mean to yell at you either. I was not violent okay! I didn't mean to ignore you. We had an ice cream feast. ha-ha. Then we watched Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and Sixth Sense to pass time. I love being piggy-backed. It was my favourite past time. THANK YOU SURYANTI for dropping me twice real hard on the ground. 2 am we all cabbed home and sleepover at my place. Su is the whiny-est person I've ever met, she cried when my hammy was like 10 metres away from her. I enjoyed it. =D We skipped school and slept in late, order Mcdonalds and continue sleeping. I'm still deprived of sleep, all thanks to Jiayan!!!!.. urrgghh.. chatterbox.. hahaha.. but it was really fun. Thanks Jiayan for applying cream and massaging my sore back for me. I <3 You!! heee!!
I love weekends. =D

I have alot of pictures to show but I am lazy to upload. I will upload them all tomorrow.

2006-07-05T08:50:00.000+08:00

Okay more pictionary fun. (by shaun). I think I have received enough doll houses to fit 10 families. haha. I decided not to live in anyone of them. I don't understand why they draw an empty dollhouse. They should at least draw a pretty girl(me) beside the houses holding a pretty flower. =(Shaun also brought me to NYC
In his fire engine. haha

There's always a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. right SUperman?

2006-07-04T08:25:00.000+08:00

Well. I can see how kids in RP find school a bore. They were practically drawing on msn. I was at home enjoying every single bit of it. It was funny to watch how they get cut off the net the same time and how they sign in the same time.

So SU drew me another doll house which Val said it looks like a temple. HA-HA. I'm loving it. She got me a cool convertible too. awwwwBen must be really bored. That's Shaunperman with washboard abs.HEEE!! Mine looks so pudgy like an inflated balloon but I'm loving the crown. =(

AND OF COURSE THIS IS TRAVIZ GOH CHIN HUAT'S MASTER PIECE. It looks like it came out from the cartoons. It looks like the houses you can find in Little Miss and Mr's story books. How adorable. Oh I adore those books. =)

2006-07-03T13:40:00.000+08:00

I had an enjoyable weekend.

I am a doll and I should live in a doll house. My msn nick is " Build me a dollhouse and paint it" .

Eugene said he painted it polka dots. I thought it looked like a hospital and the polka dots looks sickly. HA-HA.. it's cute anyway. thanksSu got me a combo dollhouse. It's made of candy. Oh how I always said I want all the sweets in the candy shop. It's called candyhouse. I can eat any corner of it. Plus I get my own perosnal butler

HEEEE!!

TRAVIZ GOH CHIN HUAT refuse to draw me a dollhouse because he thinks he's my shelter and that I do not need a dollhouse. =( =( =( He's such a bitch

2006-06-30T10:35:00.000+08:00

Sugar, we are going down.

I am so pressurized by my surroundings. I can't seem to think straight. Another mundane day in school and what's worse is that my FREAKING MSN CAN'T WORK! They keep asking me to download the new version the version and insisted that I can't continue without the new version. HEY I DOWNLOADED IT but they don't allow me to install it. =( I love my current MSN where I can nudge interminably to vent my fustration, it is so organised and lovely with each individual pictures set as the background of the chatbox. Right now, I am using the oldest version of MSN, I can't find my contacts, I can't nudge, I can't send winks. I feel so ancient and like I'm in a different era. =(

Right now I am watching Cheryl play mystery hunt, I am not even paying attention in class. I am so distracted. I am finding every reason to hate school!

Surprisingly overwhelmed.

TRAVIZ! THANKZ! HAHAHAHAHAHAAH =)

2006-06-28T20:17:00.000+08:00

ALL PICTURES CAPTIONED BY MY OH SO ARTISTIC BABY GURLL SHAN!

2006-06-28T12:15:00.000+08:00

So much - the spill canvas

What is wrong with everybody? As if the whole sky is falling on me; When everything's gone, least I've got nothing that holds on. Right now, what I feel like doing is breaking my laptop in half and chuck it into the bin together with my mobile, pager or any communicating devices. Packing all my nice clothes and shoes into my bag and elope to an island where there is only me whereby I can avoid judgemental compassion. Better still, I want to do a bungee jump into the Bermuda Triangle. As if they are doing a remix of "Britney Spears- you drive me crazy" on me.

I am now in the school library and it is so huge. I am just sitting here and doing nothig constructive. I feel so useless and helpless. I'm holding on to thick huge scientific books and I feel like studying again. School should be all about books and notes. Oh I am not complaining about my school because we do use books- NOTEBOOKS which are totally a distraction. I am more of a theoretical person I guess. Speaking of studying, I've yet to study for my English O levels. ahhhhh.. stress stress stress.

I wish I can skip school.

me : MUMMY, CAN I NOT GO TO SCHOOL TOMORROW PLEASE?
an awkward pause
mummy : NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO......

sigh, I need a breather please.

2006-06-27T11:03:00.000+08:00

Let the emotions run, let the tears flow. She is just another pretty face in the crowd.

Technology is such a bitch. I don't know why I'm touching on this, I am just bothered by the fact that I did not bring the fucking mouse to school and the touch pad is giving me alot of problem. And MSN is not helping either. Screw technology please. I feel like chucking my retarded phone into the bin. I don't even know why I'm using a cell when nobody calls. Or the people I want a call from don't come. Sometimes the first thing you want never comes. And OMG! Now we have to do a spreadsheet on EXCEL, kill me please or I'll kill technology.

I woke up the wrong side of bed, a few weeks ago.

2006-06-26T23:18:00.000+08:00

cry + whine = crhine

okay , now I'm going to crhine real bad because fucking gastric is getting all over me right now. It's as if someone had released 242321232 gigantic bees into my stomach. So school was pretty much a bore, the internet connection suck real bad that I gave up trying to connect to the stupid network. So I finally watched Just my luck. Lindsaybaby was so hot. Anything with Lindsaybaby in it is good stuff. =)

She felt neglected. She may be the IT girl but every girl has her own insecurities. Everyone's fighting to talk to her, are you?

These pictures were long overdued.

2006-06-26T22:17:00.000+08:00

You are so beautiful, it hurts .
You are so beautiful, it's bad enough to make me cry.

2006-06-26T10:41:00.000+08:00

I want all the sweets in the candy shop.
I can say I'm selfish. When I get sweets, I want them for myself. Vain attempts of trying to keep my sweets low profile never succeed. That's what happens in class everyday. Even the slightest movement of the plastic wrapper attracts the ears of my classmates. ARE SWEETS REALLY THAT GREAT or are people just greedy like me? Now I'm enjoying my skittles, when I'm given sweets with assorted flavors/colors, I'll tend to choose only the purple and red ones. I dislike the green orange and the yellow ones, they taste weird.
But for this case, I'm loving every color.
You give me cavaties.

oh serenade me with sweets please, love.

2006-06-25T19:10:00.000+08:00

Say goodbye to lindsaybaby template
and HELLO to ME!
I gave mayihavethisdancewithyou.blogspot.com a brand new look
as if she's yearning for it.
So please keep mayihavethisdancewithyou.blogspot.com up-to-date by constantly leaving comments for her. Constantly leaving comments does not mean FLOODING okay! (for the sake of some annoying cat.)
I had this temptation of changing it to ihaveahotass.blogspot.com, but when I start thinking about the hassle of telling each and every single ardent reader of mine that I've changed links. The thoughts just huants me so I'm keeping it. Besides, I AM A KEEPER.

So let's start the visual projections.

This is how I've enjoyed my week. I must say this is the best week I've had for so long. More will come , I hope.

So I found this on a friend's blog.
" You secretly think that Wathone is colorful, impulsive, and a total risk taker. "
hahaha. Well, I'm dumbfounded.

I desperately need a haircut RIGHT NOW! It's too bushy for me to handle. I just feel like grabbing the scissors and chop my mane away. EEEKK!! And I want a new color.
Jet Black is the new black.
Soon it will be, Wathone is the new black.

I've got this thing about birthdays. Like I always said, I don't do birthdays. I apologise if I don't buy presents or send birthday wishes to all of you out there. Anyway I would personally like to wish this someone whose birthday falls on 24 JUNE. If you're reading it, I would sincerely like to wish you HAPPYBIRTHDAY, I'm sorry I couldn't make it. Despite all, I send you my best regards and wishes. Have fun. =)

2006-06-22T10:16:00.000+08:00

It seemed to me that the rainbow has lost all its colors.
As if I'm becoming untouchable.
I'm having commitment and trust issues, as always.
I don't fancy two-faced bitches, anyway who does?

I'm so tired.
Sometimes I don't even feel that there's a need to go to school.
It's just a waste of my quality time.

So when the night has fallen, I see you shinning right beside me.
you are my light. =)

Maybe I'm amazed by the way I need you.

I want all the sweets in the candy shop. Then My smile will give you cavaties. (Su, not yours ah) =)

Yes yes, tiny things that matters.

2006-06-19T20:38:00.000+08:00

I have been told that pictures are worth a thousand words. =)

2006-06-19T18:50:00.000+08:00

Fuck that social circle.
It's a beautiful disaster.

School has started and it's such a bore.

Let's burn brighter than sunshine , together. =)

2006-06-15T17:25:00.000+08:00

I'm back from rugby camp,
I had so much fun, really.
The company was great great great!
But I couldn't really sleep at night.
Su narene and I were like 'WHISPERING' jokes.
I'm sorry Su that I'm a horrible sleep-er.

And there was this angel-mortal game, my favorite part of the camp.
So exciting although from the start I knew who was my angel.
I love my mortal so much but she left all my letters in camp under the bed! =(
The forgotten letters.
We played alot of stupid games, like muderer-police and three blind mice.
Narene's such a horrible mice. HA
Su and Mal are so irritating, I caught them and they denied. LOSERS.
Speaking of Mal(minah-lian) She's my idol eh. "SO CUTEE" eeeek

Training was tiring but I enjoyed it, even in my sleep-deprived state.

Now visuals with Su's pathetic 2.0megapixel digital camera.

The seinors..

Su captioned this " money-faced wathone " but I say " I'm just avoiding the paparazzi "My mortalMy Angel and I. ( sorry Su for pasting my face on yours. HA) Narene Syidah Dianty and Minah-lian

Retard

Pretty girl and I

2006-06-11T23:42:00.000+08:00

I'm heading for rugby camp tomorrow
oh I'm going to start whining about how I dislike camps.
Firstly I'll get home-sick. I'll cry in the lonely dark nights when I miss home
and there'll definitely by ghost stories or something related to that (classic)
I'll be the first to run home.
Basically I don't fancy camps unless the company is good.

My passion used to be piano,
now it's rugby. ha

Ruggers. =)

SU! COME BACK FROM KL RIGHT NOW AND JOIN CAMP TOMORROW PLEASE!!!!. urrggghh

2006-06-05T19:38:00.000+08:00

School's out.
I'm so so so so bored at home.
Honestly, I miss school. haha.
I'm so loving the company in school.
I met alot of new mates and have a few eye candies.

So GREAT Singapore Sale is on,
It's not really that great anyway.
Shopping was not fun compared to last month,
maybe I had more money last month. =(

Okay let's get on the emo part....

Sometimes I feel so ignored by some people.
A friend said I had no sense of belonging.
Maybe that's true.
I was too dependent on a particular person
and when I needed that someone,
HE/SHE is not there.
I've never felt so lost before.
As much as I like being a loner, I do need a shoulder to cry on sometimes
I'm only human.
This girl needs more than occasional hugs
I feel I have alot of friends but none of them are emotionally there.
I'm yearning for a low-profiled life =)

okay next.
The visuals

That's us. Who Doesn't love dorks?

THAT'S MY BITCH YOU ALL ARE LOOKING AT!!! ( My wonderwoman )

I've been single for the longest time.

I'm single but not available.

Maybe when the door gets broke down love can break in. =)

A BIG BIG BIG BIG BIG SHOUT-OUT TO EMO SU!!!!... HELLO!!!!!! hahahahah.

THAT'S SU YOU'RE LOOKING AT. ......ppffftttt..

2006-05-05T10:26:00.000+08:00

I'm always unhappy. People are out to ruin my life.
I'm only happy when I'm shopping; - retail therapy.

And I just found out I've got no life. I do have a life but a hectic and ridiculous life. Monday - Friday I've school and work on weekends. I got no time for rest, shopping, dates, movies, love and most importantly I'm not spending quality time with my family.

I need a break.

If only I can fall terribly ill so I'm able to skip school for a week.
If only I could push the pause button and take a breather.

For the first time, I've got time for dinner with friends. I haven't done that for like months. My world revolved around work in the past few months. Can u believe I haven't watch movies for about 6-7 months???

someone, please take me out for movies. I'll be more than happy. =)

2006-04-27T20:26:00.000+08:00

I've to watch my diet, I'd been eating way too much for my tiny stomach.

What do you do when someone came up to you and says, " You always be my pop princess, I'm ur no 1 fan. " and think about you 24/7 even though you haven met for like months or he have been carrying a torch for you like a year. After a long-lost year, he will still say that you're captivating. What do you do when everyday he would do this(the picture) at the arcade?

To you: I appreciate what you have or had done for me. The fact that you told ur mom about it and she says " ni ai de ke yi dang fan chi mah" . I want to tell you that I am not the perfect girl you would want to bring home to your mom. However, you are different from the rest. You make me feel special. You really do. As innocent as you are, you are great in your own ways. =) Thanks. I know you'll never imagined I'll blog about you. =)

Okay two weeks of school, it's fun , all those laughters and fun. And my particular eye-candy. =)

Testing out the webcam

I look damn ah lian la... urrggghhh .. It might be the conversation with Jill last night.

2006-04-22T23:27:00.000+08:00

Now, I'm always finding a reason to stay away from home or else I'm always finding a reason to stay in my room. I'm not trying to avoid the situation and of course I understand the severity of the situation. I just don't want things to turn out nasty, for you and for mom. She's living in torment. It hurts me to see her in this state.

It hurts me even more to see all of us falling apart. What happened to those weekly family dinners, those hours laughing in front of the TV ? All i can do is cry and I bet mom does the same, perhaps even harder.

When two dominant and hot- headed people are living under the same roof; tension and violence is therefore ignited.

Take all the pain away please. I hoped "those" helped

2006-04-19T09:02:00.000+08:00

MONEY MATTERS.!

Okay my dad is making a big fuss out of this
My mom and I can't stand him any longer
I feel so miserable
Every morning I go to school in tears.

sigh.

2006-04-17T00:25:00.000+08:00

okay I've been sick for a few days
I finally went tanning and swimming.
Right now i feel flab and not fab, I want to work out la
so people, I'll be more than happy if you guys want to ask me go
1)cycle
2)Blade
3)JOG
4)swim
5)GYM
6)supper!! ( oh no what am I thinking? )

I need to work out religiously and nicole richie will be my role model.

okay the visuals.

I realised that although it's my camera, the ratio of rasyidah's picture to my pictures is 10:1. As if it's her own camera.

2006-04-08T01:50:00.000+08:00

Toni Braxton's Unbreak My Heart on repeat .
I feel so emo and depressed
I'm yearning for the long-waited touch
I can't take the " maybe we can take it from there " and those " hoping to see you "s off my mind.

I'll just pause my hectic life ,stop and smile to myself, thinking of what you've said to me, those sweet nothings you so-called whispered in my ears.
Although friends repeatedly remind me that you're definitely off limits but I can't take you off my mind. =)

I want to thank everybody who is in my life, and if someone is reading this , seasonal creature especially says thanks to you.

And happy birthday daddy. Sorry for losing the phone you've bought for me. =(

2006-04-07T00:11:00.000+08:00

Okay I lost my phone. The person who've found it is a very lucky person. She can sell my phone away and go on a shopping spree. Urgghh.. The thought of it just makes my blood boil. It's only a month old and I lost all my contacts and pictures, sorry no sextape included. okay. So ya I was really depressed. Now I've to spend money and get a new phone plus I did retail therepy. I feel that something is missing/not right without a phone. Urggghhh..

I'm sick and I can feel my whole nose is falling out. I'm overworked. I need my beauty sleep!!

I came across this and I could not resist it so I bought it -SMILES- =D So anyone who's keen on giving me a ride in his or her car, I'll bring this along. =)

2006-03-31T01:16:00.000+08:00

I've never felt so miserable in my life before,
Of course i know that life doesn't always go my way.

It just feels like the whole sky just crashed onto me,
and I could picture myself waving that white flag.
And if only i've got someone to hold on to, i guess I'll be fine.

2006-03-21T23:55:00.000+08:00

New-bed plan aborted... Since my mom is being nice by allowing me to go overseas and my dad ,being the kind one, paying for my air tickets so I decided to invest my pay on a vacation. Right now I got to choose, Sydney with my BFF or Bangkok with my friends. Of course the price varies but more importantly, the fun varies too. =)

For someone who'd swept me off my feet, I sent you my miss-es, kisses and hugs. =D

I find that there are a lot of rude people around me.

2006-03-20T23:48:00.000+08:00

Ever since i started working, I never had enough sleep for weeks. So i've come to this conclusion, I'm going to invest my salary in a nice cosy bed so I can sleep all day after I quit. Picutre this ...

Then i shall get my long-waited beauty sleep and wake up looking as hot as the girl in the picture.

So ya finally I had my ikea shopping trip and my movie, I am a happy girl but I'll be the happiest girl if I can have my beauty sleep in a bed like that. I have friends telling me I need a haircut ASAP and I totally agree to that.

Oh ya Miss J!! If you're reading this.. I want to tell you I miss you like so damn bloody much. I enjoy the times when it's only the two of us, bitching, laughing and eating like nobody's business . The next time i'll be alone with you is on SUNDAY babehhh , we'll break all the RnB and Reggae CDs and listen to LINDSAY BABY all the way and a little of indie and a little of 50 CENT!!..... PLEASE LOOK FORWARD TO IT. -MUACK+peace sign- LOL .. Loves you girlfrienddd and stop looking at your mole!!

I didn't know life after O levels can be so mundane. There are alot of things I don't know about and I wished i knew.

2006-03-13T13:46:00.000+08:00

It was the laziest afternoon and i met up with BFF for swensens. =)

Courtesy of Jo the Artist. =) Thanks alot

okay my lastest craze is Photoshop, anyone willing to teach me?

Anyone willing to photoshop 500++ pictures in my computer, I'll date you for a week.(haha)

I'll be yours truly if you get me this . URGGGHH!!!

okay just joking, I wouldn't want to sell myself out with these.

2006-03-10T00:21:00.000+08:00

I want you to take me higher than before. =)

okay finally some decent picture from my new phone.

Okay i need sleep terribly.. and when can i ever talk to you again? I'm always anticipating.

2006-03-06T00:45:00.000+08:00

okay i finally onlined.
I really forgot i had a stupid blog.

Today I was in my dad's car and i requested to listen to Love Hits, some sappy oldies love song. I actually felt so so so emo.

okay i got a new phone. I'm so gald i can finally get rid of V3 as it's not user-friendly.
The best thing was i got my ipod fixed!! Yay!!.. The last i need terribly other than an Ipod video or a digicam is a haircut and color. The black roots are showing and it's so disgusting. -shudders-

I may have alot of friends around me now but half of them are what I call putting on a facade whereas the other half of them are oblivious to my presence. I know i say this very often, maybe it's something to do with the trust issue. With everybody backstabbing me, i'll never learn to trust.

Right now I MISS MY BESTEST FRIEND ON EARTH!!!!!.. sigh. I miss those days when i get to cry my heart out to her. =)

2006-02-22T16:17:00.000+08:00

I believe I'm missing something real
I need someone who really sees me
I'm still believing that you'll walk right through my door
I'm only human and nights grow colder with no-one to love me that way

All i need to know that it is for sure, then i'll give all the love in the world

all the love in the world-the corrs

2006-02-22T00:25:00.000+08:00

How i wish our conversations lasted
How i wish i was in your perfect life.
I understand one can't expect too much.

right now i want to get you out of my mind.
I fell for you hard but i crashed harder.

I enjoyed working cause the thought of you being a few buildings away from me is enough to keep me happy for a few days.

2006-02-20T15:04:00.000+08:00

I'll come home straight from work if you said you love me.

It's really nice to finally have my beauty sleep.
However i'm pretty upset that I've got a faulty ipod
and i wonder whether it'll work again
or is it just a sign for me to change it to Ipod video? (haha)
But i'm already dedicating half of my salary on a new digital camera.
and i drop my Razr on the way home last night and it got chipped off real bad and that was the first time i felt really sorry for my phone.
All the devices are against me.

A friend just messaged me and said all her favourite underwear was bleached last night, and she's giving me her atm card to go buy more underwear for her. This shows how much she trust and love me. haha So i don't think it'll hurt if i grabbed some for myself and she pays all.

2006-02-18T00:22:00.000+08:00

Finally i bought The truth about diamonds, nicole richie.
It's pretty nice.

Beautiful features you have, I melt right through them.
I'm secretly attached to you
But you'll never know.

You live such a perfect life but i'm not in it.

2006-02-07T17:36:00.000+08:00

So Friday is D-Day.
urrrgghhhhhhh
I foresee that Friday is not going to be a good day.

V-Day is coming too
Those who cannot afford to buy me diamonds
Get me "The truth about diamonds" by Nicole Richie
It's a fairly acceptable alternative.

Ok I also foresee that no one is going to get me that
So i need to get my butt out of the house and grab the book ASAP, cause it's so appealing

2006-02-03T22:24:00.000+08:00

Today will be quite an angry post cause someone made me fucking mad.

so you said "If i knew, we should just be friends last time"
This sentence depicts your regret in being more than friends with me, how comforting, thank you.

and you said " it only took me a week to forget you"
This sentence shows how neurotic you were la..

I'm just so mad because i remembered vividly you said " hey don't ever ignore me la, even if u want to ignore me you let me know first don't just disappear suddenly," so I agreed.

HEEELLLOOO!!! look who's ignoring who now without a word?.. two-faced bitch

Not to mention how deceitful you were during the 6/7 months we had.Of course you enforced strongly that we have to be honest with each other and a "no secrets between us" policy. But did you keep up to it? If you said you did, i'm going to spit you a big HA-HA.

A four-letter word would sum you up which is L-I-A-R.

Actually i could have cite more evidently-examples but i choose not to do so to save your sorry ass.

And I do sincerely apologised for the crudity in my language.
Sorry it's neither personal nor offensive.

2006-02-01T23:41:00.000+08:00

So they say a a person isn't complete without Friends
and there are friends every girl simply can't live without
and they are

1.The Old Friend
2.The opposite friend
3.The listening friend
4.The fashion friend
5.The party friend
6.THE GUY FRIEND!!

Basically, half of the people in my buddylist are too busy with their own life to notice me or i suppose they are oblivious to my presence and the other half are simply just ignoring me. So that makes me a lonely person.
And i suppose i'm going to spend Valentines' Day with someone I've known for 16 years- ME. I won't be surprised if i don't even get a bar of kit-kat.

2006-01-23T23:58:00.000+08:00

SOME PEOPLE JUST DON'T THINK.

and

SOME PEOPLE ARE JUST OUT TO IRRITATE THE SHIT OUT OF ME.

and

SOME PEOPLE REALLY DON'T CARE BUT ACT LIKE THEY DO.

but

some people may disagree with me.

2006-01-21T23:23:00.000+08:00

I feel so not myself today.
I began to wonder about life, my life in fact.
Whatever, bullshit.
I just feel sad and grumpy.

Are fairy tales just a facade?
and
Do happy endings only exist in fairy tales?

Enough of my rantings, I just felt really sad today
So last night was the class gathering.
I was really very happy to see my classmates.
Feelings of nostalgia overcame me when i see them laughing and playing like old times.
I really do miss school and my classroom.
Ok the Visuals.

THE BEGINNING

THE MINGLING AND BBQ-ING

THE CAM-WHORES

THE END

2006-01-16T14:17:00.000+08:00

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.

You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage pessimistically. You don't think happy marriages exist anymore.

In this moment, you think of love as something you don't need. You just feel like flirting around and playing right now.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

Actually i'll would be forced to break up with someone who don't listen when i speak and who does not have guilty conscience. urrrgggghhhh!!!.. emotinal,moody,difficult to please , i think i can handle it. I HATE DISHONESTY!

like i said , i'll never learn to trust again.

2006-01-15T22:45:00.000+08:00

yes 5 mins ago. i accidentally spilt chocolate milk again .

urrrrggghhh and my mother's carpet was soiled.

2006-01-15T17:54:00.000+08:00

ok great i was awaken at 4.35A.M by some itchy feeling on my arm.When i opened my eyes, i lay there nonplussed.
A BIG FAT UGLY COCKROACH WAS ONLY 10 CM AWAY FROM MY FACE and is SUCKING THE BLOOD OUT OF MY ARM.(do cockroaches suck blood? i don't think so) i jumped out of my bed and screamed for my uncle. urrrgggghhhh eeew. i hate cockroaches now and have officially developed a phobia of them NOW.

i was also greeted by a series of unfortunate events later.

1) i walked a fucking 15 mins to the dvd rental store and was told i needed an IC to rent the dvds and then i walked another freaking 15 mins home.

2) i flung my pudgy arms and they hit my glass of chocolate milk. Broken glass and milk all over the kitchen floor. what made it worse was that the milk was CHOCOLATE. it took me a long time to clean the mess up. i hope mommy won't notice one of her glasses M.I.A

3) while cleaning up the mess, i totally forgot i was cooking fried rice until i smelt burnt rice.

can my day get any worse?

I'M CURSED BY COCKROACHES!!!!!!!!!!!!

2006-01-12T01:01:00.000+08:00

FAB NOT FLAB PLEASE

2006-01-09T23:26:00.000+08:00

Liquored up Liquored up!
stupefied by alcoholic drinks.
It seems like I woke up beneath a different sky
And I'm drunk on what I'm seeing through these open eyes

DAMN it's really HARD
everything was so oddly surreal
everything just crashed including me.

i'll never learn to trust again.

2006-01-06T00:33:00.000+08:00

-courtesy of postsecretsingapore-

someone take me to the gym please.

2006-01-05T17:10:00.000+08:00

I forgot i'd a blog.

life is like so mundane but my dreams are interesting,
i wish i could live in my dream-world where everything's so perfect.
last night i dreamt I was chased by this really really hot guy and he gave me a Range Rover, a limegreen Ferrari and a chauffeur. What more could i've asked for?
How materialistic.
I even dreamt I was a drug dealer.
If only life was that interesting(not that i want to sell drugs)
and also i dreamt that i shook hands with oprah. =)

School has started for everyone but me.
I missed School so so much
all my friends all the laughters .
I miss having homework.

I need a job badly. i'm so wasting my time and money right now.

2006-01-02T01:34:00.000+08:00

Some fun on the beach

I just love my cliques. =D

ok moving on. Genting was a total bore. i was alone all of the time.
i'm never going there ever again without my cousins. urrggghhh!

I seriously need a driving license and a car.
Or an alternative, a chauffeur and a car
just because i have to wait 5 years for my license and i can't wait that long.
To me i believe Car is an essential.
This is what i call a real beauty. Range rovers are the new black. classic

oh ya, Happy New Year. It's 2006 already? that's fast.

2005-12-29T01:27:00.000+08:00

Seriously Singapore needs to launch these gadgets

The features of the T-Mobile Sidekick® II decked out in one-and-only Juicy Couture style. E-mail, instant message, or capture the moment with the on-board camera. Communication never looked so good.

i'm willing to pay any price for this. it's even better than Motorola RzrPINK.

damn.. pity it doesn't have bluetooth.

2005-12-25T02:47:00.000+08:00

Season Greetings !!

Merry christmas =)

>>> rasyidah-- on the first day of christmas my true love sent to me ONE LINDSAY LOHAN for me to keep.
>>>Li jun-- i'm know i'm the first on ur wishlist not some mary or kate or ashley..=D
>>>jovi--Merry christmas. i owe u present ok. let's meet up next week

>>>BERLINE!!-- doubt u will see this but =) merry xmas.. hang out lehhh.. say wanna hang but nvr. =(

2005-12-23T17:58:00.000+08:00

I am officially suffering from lindsay-ism..
She has such addictive features Her freckles are her only flaw, you may say, but that's what turns me on. =)